This is a song I've been waiting to write for a while. I'm super pumped that it is done and I can share it! I wrote a song in college entitled, "Speak to Me." It is the only song that I've ever written that I look back on and say, "You know, I really don't think I knew what I was talking about..." It was written from a honest spirit, but the idea of the song was, "God, I don't know what to do after college, I'm going to need to you to show up and speak." It was your typical God-why-don't-you-show-up-with-your-neon-signs sort of deal. Not that it is bad to seek direction from God: It is a good thing! It is also not bad to desire God's voice to speak into Your life. So, what has changed in my perspective?
I don't think we have the right to say to God, "You have to speak to me." He has given us all we need for life and godliness, and when he deems it necessary, He will speak to us. He may do it in an ordinary or unordinary way. But we have no right think we have the power to command the God of the universe to speak to us exactly when we want Him to.
With that being said, the bridge of the song is about Elijah's encounter with God on the mountain (Mt. Sinai actually!). God wasn't in the powerful earthquake, or wind, or fire, but in a gentle whisper. A completely broken and worn out Elijah needed that specific revelation of God at that time. That was the only part of the song I kept. I decided to really look into Elijah's story and write the song from the perspective of his prior few days before his encounter with God.
Elijah feels completely and utterly exhausted and alone. He has been a prophet for some time, has had a "mountain top experience" (pun intended) against the prophets of Baal where God shows Himself victorious. Still, Israel is unrepentant, content to chase after false gods, and put to death any true prophet. Elijah fears that he is all that is left. What happens when he is gone? Although he is tired and I think there is a lot of his plea that is simply centered around, "God this is unfair, please save me," I also think that it is important to note that God's glory is at stake too. If Elijah was truly the only one and he died, what happens to God's covenant faithfulness? Spoiler alert: Elijah isn't the only one. In fact, somehow without his knowing, there are 7,000 true believers still in Israel. How often are we alone and we need to know God has preserved people with a true faith in Himself to come alongside us as we seek to live as He would have us live? How often are my struggles with loneliness wrongly construed into a false belief that God has left me without His support through His people? God always preserves a remnant for Himself. A remnant is a remaining part of something. God has a remnant right now. We are in it. Other parts of the remnant are in our worlds of influence.
This song is meant to be a life and hope giving picture, seen through the imagery of the story of Elijah. I hope you like it! (A final closing thought about the really cool elements of this song: the imagery God gave me to use ties in with Israel's history and it wasn't intentional until it was already in it. We/Elijah are a "lone star" at one point. But, the children of Abraham will be as numerous as the stars in the sky....cool stuff!!)
I feel the weight of the silence
My thoughts betray my fear of the giants
I'm living as if I'm a stranger with those who don't know Your name
Like a myriad of fires gone to embers and I'm the only one that remains
Tell me I'm not alone
That Your people live on to see Your kingdom come
Show me that hope's never lost
That from ashes and dust, You raise a remnant thousands strong
This is my appeal; You don't have to answer
Reveal that You're here; It's all that matters
Like a lone star burns in the twilight as the world around's growing dark
When I don't see a sign of revival, can You quiet my restless heart?
Wind blows hard at the rocky ledge
Earthquake begins at my foundation
Spark the flame, consume all around me
Like Elijah up on the mountain
I found out You're not in the fire
Not in the earthquake, not in the wind
You're present here, though I haven't heart You yet,
Is that You whispering?
Can You quiet my restless heart?
My name is complicated. My parents named me Theresa. My friends call me "Pinky." My professional title is "Ms. Lindell." Choose one.